And my mother in law left

On the 5th of May "the husband" took her to the airport where she took a direct flight to Argentina.
To my, and her surprise, I cried in the morning!!
The thing was that I left very early, before she was awake, and when I returned home, at around 10am, I was expecting to find her busy finishing packing but she was not to be seen... The flat was completely empty and it was if like a frozen hand grabbed my heart. I make myself a cup of tea and then she arrived and when I saw her.... I just burst into tears!!
All of a sudden I felt very sad and terribly lonely.
For goodness sake!! What's wrong with me!! The lady was a pain the backside most of the time, she's demanding, doesn't help around the house, messed up my bookshelves and turned upside down our routine... I truly though that I was going to be totally relieve when she finally went home. But no, when the moment arrived I was crying and feeling terribly sad.

To her credit, I have to say that she was as shocked as I was and the only thing she managed to say was: -"I didn't have a clue that you liked me being here! That you feel like this". To which I answered, still in tears and with my arms wrapped around her neck: "I didn't know either!".

Go figure!

The flat is really empty since she's gone and I really miss to have somebody here, even though she was useless and we bickered almost all the time... well... I guess that I miss having family around. In Bristol we always had friends and they were (and are) very loyal and I knew that I could count on a number of them, phone them and they'd be with me if need be. While here I've been feeling really alone. Being in Bristol recently just serve to remained me how lonely I really feel and now even she was going.

Don't get me wrong, living here is good but all this experience's been harder that what I wanted to admit even to myself. I know it takes time to make new friends and I know that it¡s even harder the older you get and I know all the theory... but I feel I'm holding myself up by my own hair... like the Baron Munchausen in the old movie saving himself from drowning by pulling himself out of the water by the straps of his boots (or his own hair, don't really remember). It doesn't really work in real life... not even as metaphor.